Things People Say

At a party last weekend...

"Hushed" because G was sitting next to me: "Does he know you're not his mom?"

Soccer Fun

I'm glad G is able to be on a soccer team.  It's working because his babysitter Mr. Peter takes him to the 5:00 practices.  I meet them there and take G home.  Perfect!

Last Saturday we had our team photos taken.  I got to meet another mom - Denise - there.  Denise asked who my child was, and I pointed out G. 

Denise (confidently): I've talked with his father.

Me (stumbling, looking around to see if there's a Black man in the room): uhhh...

Denise (trying to help me): ... your husband.

Me: uhhh...

Eventually we determine that she has talked with Mr. Peter.  i.e. My 19-year-old babysitter.  i.e. NOT my husband!  Seriously?

This Saturday G had his first game.  G invited everyone under the sun, but the only person able to come was Joseph's dad.  He got to witness a thrilling game.  Interestingly, G - normally so very bold - was not.  He'd kind of jog over to the ball and then let someone else kick it.  He enjoyed playing but didn't seem to fully grasp the purpose or the competitive aspect.

Joseph's dad left a bit early and Denise caught my eye.

Me (helpfully): He's not my husband either.

Denise (confidently): But he is G's dad.  Well, obviously.

Me: No.  But he is my other son's dad.

Conclusion - G is currently the weakest link on his team.  I'm not much more solid among the moms.  But we are both enjoying soccer!

Inappropriate Adoption Question #42

The boys & I were at a fundraiser yesterday.

One of the volunteers was especially interested in G.

We were playing ball across the field and she called over to us:


"G.  Is that his real name?"


I looked at her.  She continued:


"... you know, his real name since the beginning..."

That was a new one.

Awkward

Joseph had an interesting experience last week. 

He was called into the principal's office.  There, he was faced with a stammering school official.  Apparently, the conversation went something like this:

"Well, uh, Joseph.  We.. congratulations.  I mean, your nomination for National Achievement Scholarship, well, that's.. It's just that.. Well, your records.. Because it's significant.. If you just.. I mean, right here (turning his computer to face Joseph).. You know, the qualifications for that scholarship include.. And you see.. You'd need to be of African descent.. So, it's just that, uh.. You're records show.. If you see here.. It says that, uh.. You're White."

New Sporting Event

The boys & I participated in quite an exciting event the other day...

Synchronized Gawking

It was amazing to behold.

The event started by me, then Joseph, then G exiting our car at the pizza place.  On the patio, a Little League team was gathered - along with coaches, parents, and sundry little siblings.  As my family exited our car, a hush fell over the performers - absolutely all conversation stopped.  One by one their heads swiveled over to watch us, like dominoes falling in a line - every single head ended up facing us.  And as we walked past them into the restaurant, they all - in perfect unison - did a complete synchronized swivel so that their eyes remained perfectly fixed on us the entire time. 

We're talking at least 30 people - completely silent and totally focused on us.  It was eerie to me, although Joseph didn't seem to notice.

Until we got inside & he exclaimed: "WHAT was THAT?!"

We had a good laugh at the freaky people.  I figured they just couldn't determine if I was Angelina Jolie or Sandra Bullock.  So it provided some amusement.

Somehow I doubt that I'll be as amused when G is old enough to notice and be hurt by stuff like this.

Any thoughts on how you would have handled the situation?

Big Happenings

This morning we had G's full school evaluation!  We met with the school psychologist, speech therapist, occupational therapist, physical therapist, and an intern.  They apologized that the social worker couldn't make it - !  So far, I'm impressed with the team.  They seem knowledgeable, caring, and professional.  I was hoping G would at least qualify for speech therapy.  They think he'll qualify for the whole morning special preschool program.  Unfortunately we won't know for sure until late August.  That'll make for interesting daycare arrangements.

During the eval, I was shocked to see how much G has learned in the past 2 months since his 1st eval.  He can do so much more - language, behavior, strength, coordination, comprehension - it's unbelievable.  My favorite moment was when one lady asked about his ability to identify body parts.  I told her that "nose" was the only guarantee, with "eyes" sometimes making the list.  G correctly did "nose" and "eyes"!  And then "mouth", "foot", "ear", and "head"!  Yee-haw!  He couldn't do elbow, but who really needs to know "elbow" anyway?

Also today was G's preschool graduation.  Yep, after 3 weeks in school he's earned his diploma.  I'm expecting he'll be finished with college by September.

The children did a "performance" for the parents before the diplomas were handed out.  They had been practicing their songs all year.  Of course, you couldn't hear much because several of the children were freaking out screaming - first, because they wanted to sit with their parents; and then, because they're 2.  The parts of the performance that we could hear were approx. 8 different children's songs sung solo by the teacher because not one child would sing with her.  It was well worth the hour of vacation time that I had to use in order to attend.

After the "performance" there was a "party," where the children all sat around the table & ate tons of snacks.  (Yes, all right before dinnertime.)  Some of the parents hovered over their children.  Other parents mingled.  And one parent chose to drill me with bizarre-ness.  Observe:

- After confirming that G belonged to me: "His hair is so soft."  Sharing this news with me was apparently the reason she approached me.  I wasn't sure how to respond.  I considered: "Huh, I haven't analyzed your child's hair yet" or "Please don't pet my child."  But I think I settled for "uh-huh." 

- Undeterred, she carried on, asking me where G was from.  She asked: "So, how do you pick your child?  Do you get to go there and say (pointing) 'I like that one?'"

- She also needed to know if I'd adopt again and if I'd do "one like him again" or I could "get a Chinese."

All the time, I'm getting better at fielding & avoiding personal questions, but I would have to say that I lost this particular skirmish.  At least I've been able to ponder some wonderful new responses for next time.

What a day.